Spoilt for choice

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After sifting through the many holiday brochures and making your choice, was your summer holiday how you imagined it would be? We all need some respite in our lives and summer holidays can provide just that. However, for some people when families are forced together on the annual pilgrimage to their family destination, there comes the realisation that all is not well.

You return home to begin the search, not for the next holiday but advice and support. Of the many choices facing you, most contact a solicitor to gain a better understanding of what to do when there are signs that your relationship, married or otherwise, is at an end.

And the good news?

There are a wealth of agencies offering assistance, from counselling services and mediation through to financial advice and the judicial system. Added to all this is the new kid on the block; the Collaborative Process. It has been designed to bring many disciplines together to make a real difference to what is, without question, a very stressful and difficult time.

What is the Collaborative Process?

The hint is in the name. It is a process, which encourages the parties to work together on settling their matrimonial issues, rather than do this through court combat. Collaborative Law originated in America and has been brought to the UK through the organisation Resolution first for family law.

Under the process, the couple instruct separate lawyers who are collaboratively trained. Instead of the lawyers and parties adopting their normal opposing roles and exchanging letters and documentation, the majority of the work is carried out by way of round table meetings, between all the parties and their collaborative lawyers. These meetings allow the parties to work towards an agreement to resolve their relationship breakdown outside of the court process.

By entering into a collaborative agreement, the couple bind themselves with their lawyers so that if the collaborative meetings fail, they will have to instruct alternative solicitors to take the case to court. This reinforces the fact that the parties are committed with their lawyers to reaching a consensual agreement rather than a hard fought or imposed one.

And the benefits are?

• Non-confrontational meetings between the parties and legal teams, which avoid the need for hostile or threatening-looking letters. This prevents the flames being fanned, which so often heightens conflict.

• Unlike Mediation, both parties will have their lawyers in the meetings with them who can help them to work towards a full understanding of the law. It helps them focus on what should be the best solution for the family issues such as the family home, how they can manage financially and the arrangements for the children.

• The ability to involve other experts like accountants in the meetings who do not take sides, but rather help to identify important information that will aid a common solution.

• More control over the time that the meetings need to take to reach agreement.

• A well-known, but all too rarely acknowledged fact is that children are damaged more by an acrimonious separation than when the parents work through their differences. It may seem easier to carry on the arguments that have brought a couple to the end of their relationship. People often look for vindication to deal with the pain they experience and by doing so get sucked in to prolonging the animosity. It requires courage from each person to resume control and civil communication. The reward will be a much better outcome for each member of the family through the Collaborative Process.

Profile

Dawn Harrison is a trained Collaborative Family Lawyer and Mediator. She is Chairman of Resolution (Kent) and an accredited specialist in the field of family law. She has a particular interest in cohabitation and private child law, and extensive experience dealing with financial provision, both as a lawyer and a mediator.

She graduated in law from Exeter University and went on to complete her Law Society finals at the Guildford College of Law.

Dawn joined Whitehead Monckton in 1985, becoming a partner in 1994.

To email Dawn, click here